By Jeovanne Finch-Negron For many people, family is the support system that helps them overcome obstacles. What happens when it is the anchor that drags you down? It makes some obstacles seem like they are insurmountable, but it takes a certain mindset to look through the fog and persevere. The setbacks of an unstable family life have not kept me down, that have made me who I am today. One main challenge I have faced was the lack of support from my family. In my earlier years of life, I had to rely on myself when I needed the most help. The lack of empathy, care and support from my mother and a false father figure that entered my life after my dad passed away had a major effect on my mental health, and childhood growth. My younger brother's dad, the false father figure, conditioned me to not trust the words of others. It was little things that built to that loss of trust: he would promise to be there, then not show; tell me he’s got me next time, then not follow through. I had to rely on myself, and myself only. As a result, I put so much weight onto my shoulders to become the best person that I could be, and to not become like my false father figure. Around the age of 12, I took on the role of a father figure for my younger brother. I wanted to teach him how not to follow in his father’s footsteps. In order to be a positive role model for my brother, I strived to teach him the importance of education and attending college. I began working at Wegmans to show him the importance of working for what you want and having stability. I also want to show my brother what it means to maintain positive, healthy relationships. I have dedicated myself to making sure he has a positive role-model in his life. The setbacks of an unstable family life could have limited my future, but instead I’ve used it to start off with a clean slate, allowing me to shape and sculpt this person that I envision myself to be: a reliable leader and advocate. I work in all aspects of my life to bring my vision into fruition. For example, I am captain of the track team which allows me to advocate for my fellow teammates to lead them onto the best path for them. I protect them, sometimes from themselves. One track meet we had that was extremely hot. One of my track runners, who was about to run a relay, was on the verge of heat stroke so I had to tell the coach that he could not run the race for his own health. Another way that I have taken on leadership roles is through my community by working at Teen Empowerment and participating in Upward Bound. These groups allow me to use my voice to advocate problems occurring in our community and work to bring positive changes. Upward Bound helped me advocate for my future and support others who are trying to do the same. It proved that teens can gather together to advocate for people who don’t have a voice within the community. My experiences of being a parentified child have shaped my character and taught me lessons on looking at the bigger picture. The years of persistent work to find my voice and true character opened my eyes to what I am capable of. I have acquired the skill to adapt to overcome challenges while not losing my sense of self. While providing for my younger brother and my community I continue to find myself striving to be an athlete, scholar, brother, son, captain of the track team, and ultimately me, Jeovanne.
6 Comments
Marlene Blocker
1/3/2023 01:02:54 pm
Exceptionally well written. Continue to be a great model for your brother!
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Mr. Wilson
1/3/2023 01:57:44 pm
This is powerful. Your resilience will be the cornerstone to your success as an adult.
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Linda Dunsmoor
1/4/2023 11:51:35 am
This is a spendid piece of writing. Thank you for sharing your story.
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Dr. Shaun C Nelms
1/4/2023 04:55:44 pm
Excellent essay. In all that you do, remember to allow yourself to be a kid. Find time to just relax and enjoy the little things in life (walking, reading, laughing with others, etc).
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Daniel Hart
1/5/2023 06:59:45 am
I'm so proud of the growth you've gone through since I first met you in freshman Literacy. I could tell you were a very thoughtful young man, but you seemed reserved, like you had internal struggles you were going through. This article helps explain those. Its amazing how you were able to take those struggles and let them not defeat you, but rather forge you into who you are today.
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Valerie Marsh
1/26/2023 06:01:04 am
What an advocate you are for your peers, your brother, your community, and yourself! You write eloquently about your journey.
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